More musings on death

I have a picture in my mind of what happens when a loved one dies, human or pet, I don't think it matters.I don't know if the destruction of something like your home would work the same way--that's more of a one way attachment. If you loved them, you suffer when they leave. They don't suffer--they're gone but you're left behind with this hole in your mind. I see a string that stretches from my mind to whoever, the more you love the stronger the string, the larger the point at which it connects to your mind. When the loved one dies, the string pulls lose, leaving a wound that takes a while to fill in and heal. I used to think the string broke, but now I think it gets pulled out of it's mooring. It eventually scabs then scars over but the first few days/weeks/months are the worst. You're constantly aware of the injury done to you and it just takes time, I guess...

Musings on Death, Like this Will be Real Original!!!

We've been going over and over, in our minds, all the things that one does when someone you love dies. I think if it's someone you didn't love the whole dynamic becomes different! Gee, I really wish I'd told that so and so what I really thought!!!!

The would haves/should haves/could haves that keep going through your mind, even though, at this point, it's all far too late. Nothing can be changed. I guess we can hope to learn from these experiences so that we might do better in future ones...or, being human, we'll repeat the same dumb mistakes, over and over, not able to learn a darn thing.

If we'd only...

Dad said he'd never go home from the hospital. Of course, he said it the last time too and he did go home, for over a year. Maybe he felt he had to prove something this time---See, I told you I was sick!! We know we did the best we could but we feel that our best should have been a lot better. I know there are so many who are a member of this club, and many under much more difficult circumstances. Just venting, this blog is a great venue for this. I have no idea who might read it so I can just talk to the air. Sort of like talking to god...

Mom and Dad

Mom and Dad this fall at Thelma's B&B in Crawfordsville, IN.

Thank you again, all who sent cards and kind thoughts. Also, thanks for the donation to the David Parrish Post American Legion in Dad's name. He would have been very proud.

Sad, very Sad, News

My Dad died on Nov. 16th, at Parkview Heart Institute.He was 96 and he and Mom had just celebrated their 58th anniversary the Monday before he died. He was getting ready, with my Mom's help, to go home when he just keeled over. He died standing up, with his pants on, I guess it could be so much worse. This has been a rough time. My brother went into the hospital the following Tuesday with kidney failure, but he's out and is better. Thanks to all who sent cards and good wishes. You can read the obit and sign the guest book if you wish. Guest book: http://www.legacy.com/fortwayne/GB/GuestbookView.aspx?PersonId=98219879
http://www.legacy.com/fortwayne/DeathNotices.asp?Page=SearchResults
It's very strange to be going through this, not like it's a surprise but still!!!

I picked up the cremains today and took them home. We set him on his recliner for awhile, he'd wanted so much to get home and enjoy the comforts of his house. I wish we could have given him what he wanted, one last time.

Halloween Baby

This was part of a Halloween Display on Third Street that I saw when doing my nightly dogwalk. I have to say I found it mildly disturbing and yet, on the other hand, they did a really good job with it. Yes, it is just a doll!!!

Dad is getting a pacemaker tomorrow. Wish him luck.

Sad News

My father is in the hospital right now with heart problems. It's not looking too good, he has aortic valve trouble and he's too old for surgery. I guess at 96 you really don't want them cracking open your chest! It's pretty stressful, but we'll manage. It comes to us all eventually.

When dogs go bad.

This is what happens when good dogs go bad. Charlotte stikes again.

The Difference between Men and Women

Last Monday I took my dad to the eye doctor for a post surgery checkup and an eye exam. After we were done, we went to Cunningham's to pick out some new glasses for him. I showed him where the men's glasses were and pointed out a few. He tried on one pair and said "Okay, I'll take it."!!!!!!

When I went with mom to get her glasses we went to four different places before she found what she wanted.

The cat's butt is doing okay. I get to put baby ointment on it.

My Mother's Cat

I took my mother's cat, Susie Q (hey, I didn't name her) to the vet yesterday for a check up. I'm not quite sure how to say this in a delicate manner, but Susie has an injured sphincter. It was that way when she strolled into my parents life, and every so often it causes her trouble. We really don't know what happened to her--animal attack, human cruelty--but instead of looking like the usual O that most cats have under their tails, she has an I there. Sometimes her glands don't express properly and so some lucky vet or tech gets to do the dirty deed. Susie is feeling much better now.

I take my mom and dad to their doctors and their cat to the vet. Am I lucky or what?

Okay, I've done the blog, I've done Flickr, I've posted pictures, and now I set up an RSS. Not exactly sure how much use that will be to me but that's the way it is.

Oh, Oh, Charlotte

Okay, so we decided to keep Charlotte Sophia. We'd been crating her under my big old fashioned desk, and she'd stayed there just fine. Now, suddenly, she jumps over the barricade and we find her just anywhere in the house. Did she know that she was safe now? So far she's been okay and hasn't eaten anything important...yet. It's just odd, that she would stay there since July and the very next day after we didn't give her away...

Pledge time at NIPR. I'm waiting for a double money thing before I pledge. We do it once a year and get Newsweek so that's pretty cool. Please pledge if you listen to Public Radio--well worth your money.

Url and Hidy meet the 'Gator!

Hidy stops the 'gator from munching down on her little boy,Url.

Charlotte Sophia

We almost gave Charlotte away this weekend but, when it came down to putting the leash on her and letting her get in the (very nice) lady's car, we just couldn't do it. I guess we're stuck with her. She looked at us with those big blue eyes and that was all she wrote. It's not so much that I'm attached to her as she's so attached to us. I know it would just stress her out a whole bunch.

Feeling old now.

My stepson and wife just announced today that they are going to become parents. Whoa, like this makes me a potential stepgrandma....

Upside Down Boyd

This is Boyd. Boyd's a hoot. Well, really he's a cat but he's a strange and wonderful beast. He is hyper-alert, so alert in fact, that I have to give him Valium and Prozac to help keep him level. When he's upside down, all's right with the world.

This is Smarty Pants. He's a stray I picked up (oh, gee, are we surprised?) a year ago July, I think. He's FIV/FeLV + and has had some health issues but for right now he's doing really well. He's been neutered and had all his teeth pulled and is a big fat lovable cat. He is so friendly and sociable, he's a joy to be with. I would really like to find a home for him, as he's living in my husband's house right now and he'd be so happy to be with people all the time. Need a cat? I've got one!

This is Charlotte Sophia, the dog I found running down the middle of Tyler St. She had a nice collar, no tags, no chip, unspayed, well taken care of and very social but apparently no one wanted to find her. I still have hopes of finding a good home for her but she has issues. She chews things up (like my husband's shoe, my wooden armadillo, mousetraps, cat toys, envelopes, and her bed) she likes to dig and she is kind of shy. On the other hand, she runs like the wind and is total beauty to watch. She does not run away. She runs circles around Guy, my other dog and keeps making him come back, so it works out pretty well.

If you know anyone who needs a gentle, sweet, loving, shy dog....let me know.

That is all.

Yesterday was my son's birthday--37, hard to believe. Today I took my dad to get some laser surgery on his eye, hopefully it will make it easier for him to read. He's a young 96.

I took my two dogs for a nice long walk this evening. I love the cooler weather. Both my dogs are strays--one got abandoned in my neighborhood, the other I found running down the middle of Tyler. I think she got dumped from a car. Eventually I'll probably go into detail about all my pets, something that everyone will be utterly fascinated by!

That is all.

Hi, folks, I'm new to this and can't imagine why anyone would want to read my ramblings, but here I go--the cat to the left is Becky Beagle Biter, one of my 11 cats. As you can tell by my blog name, I'm a crazy cat lady and I work at a Library--how cool is that? I'll probably post bunches of pictures of my wonderful cats, my two dogs, and maybe even the husband.

Life at Little Turtle is exciting today. We had a water leak last night and Barb the Great did mop duty. Water leaked from the second floor into the juvenile picture book area, taking down some of the ceiling tiles and making a big mess. We closed early last night and are scheduled to open today at 1. We shall see.

That is all for now.